Of Hearty Affections And Brotherly Love
by JeanneFate-x
Summary: "Oh I'm sure we all have a 'Kurt' in our life, Blaine. Wikipedia likes to refer to it as 'significant other'. 'Soul mate' works too, if you're one of the hopelessly romantic."   A series of Klaine-centred oneshots of all shapes and sizes.
1. Sticky notes part I

**Author's note:** Oh my gosh I've done it. I popped my writing-gay-romance cherry. I'm so proud of myself. Honestly I thought it would be Merthur that would win me over, but Klaine trumps every other possible couple because... well because it's Kurt and Blaine and I have an unhealthy infatuation with Darren Criss' music. And quite possibly his smile too, and the pink sunglasses. I'm also blushing now and it isn't the point.

Herein thau shalt find a collection of oneshots featuring Klaine in all it's **superfoxymegaawesomehot** glory and some Anderson family shenanigans that help the lovely couple along the way. Will contain everything from fluff to a little bit of angst, a funny sex talk perhaps, and a sister OC, to provide a witty third person perspective and some additional humour. **Rating is mostly to be safe, for some language and possible future smut**.

Inspired by an interview with Darren and Lauren (?) who plays Becky. And dear God have you seen how cute and cuddly they are? He is such an inspiration and all kinds of awesome and I'm going to shut up now because I've talked enough and I'm embarrassing myself with my dorkish and fangirlish ways.

**PLAYLIST INCLUDES**

"**You And Me**" - Parachute

"**First Time**" - Lifehouse

"**Just A Kiss**" - Lady Antebellum

"**Teenage Dream**" - Blaine and the Pips*

*... kidding, I mean The Dalton Academy Warblers

**If you've heard anywhere that I own Glee it's a lie made up by the media**. I just enjoy making the characters do stuff that pleases my imagination.

**More Klaine goodies to come if you show some love to the review and subscription buttons**.

Enjoy.

**WARNING**: slight mention of the supposedly less than ideal Anderson-family relationships, but mostly it's just goodies.

* * *

><p><strong>x~X~x<strong>

It's Sunday afternoon at the Lima Bean and Kurt is running late for coffee.

Apparently Carole was having some kind of wardrobe crisis that only Kurt could help out with, and thus had to leave for Dalton later than planned. It's not a big deal, Blaine considers. It's not like he is impatient to see his best friend or anything. Just because he might have missed Kurt over the weekend, that doesn't mean he can't simply get their order and wait for Kurt to arrive without making an internal fuss about it.

He ends up doing it anyway, because they've had a moment of painful honesty on Friday where Kurt confessed to being jealous of Blaine's solos, and the weekend got in the way before they could truly talk it over.

Blaine hates leaving loose ends, especially with Kurt.

He knows things have not been entirely perfect ever since the Rachel-Berry-liplock-fiasco, and just as they managed to smooth that train-wreck over with awkward apologies and matching coffee orders, came the supposedly sexy performance and mention of gas pains, and Blaine really wishes he had kept that comment to himself, because... well that was a really weird case of verbal diarrhoea.

No pun intended.

And this is where it all really got weird. Before Blaine could stop himself he was handing over car parts and giving Burt Hummel a Gay Sex One-Oh-One, and overstepping so many lines it wasn't even funny any more.

Blaine did it, regardless, because he cared more for his friend than he did for his silly pride. It sucked, admittedly, but Burt was surprisingly cool about it. Perhaps a little freaked out and occasionally wincing.

So it came as a shock when Blaine found himself getting really worked up behind his cracking poker-face. There he was, talking about Kurt fooling around with another guy, a stranger Blaine might not know or approve of, but would have no say in the matter when or if it were to happen, and that majorly sucked. Not that he doesn't want Kurt to find someone to do that stuff with, he just really doesn't want to see him hurt by some stranger... or something.

What's worse is that that whole conversation had him unintentionally thinking about Kurt in ways friends – _best_ friends, because that's what they are – should avoid and leave up to boyfriends... or lovers, and it did strange things to his heart – things Blaine plans on having checked out, because arrhythmia is not to be taken lightly.

He really hopes there is a cure for his Kurt induced heart-disease, which has appallingly many hazardous side-effects. Among the most common are catching himself staring at his _best friend_'s lips and marvelling over their colour, or admiring what is inside of Kurt's jeans – that, for the record, seem tighter than should be legally permitted – rather than their brand. It's a horrible distraction and it doesn't help that Kurt is running late for coffee, because now Blaine has nothing to focus on that would prevent his imagination from doing overtime, and why is he thinking about this again?

"What can I get you?"

Wait what?

His head snaps up, only to meet the eyes of a very confused and slightly annoyed looking barista, who must have already asked him that at least two times.

_Oh_, right.

Coffee.

_Focus._

Blaine clears his throat awkwardly and quickly starts fishing for his wallet. He knows he's lost his usual smooth confidence soon after he started thinking about Kurt's jeans and he's struggling to get it back. There's a displeased groan heard from somewhere near the end of the line and a blush blooms on Blaine's cheeks. What was he supposed to order? And why is he suddenly so goddamn clueless?

He opens his mouth to finally answer when someone reaches a hand over his shoulder and places a few bills onto the counter right next to him.

"He'll probably have a Medium Drip, he's predictable like that," says a female voice dangerously close to the back of Blaine's head, sounding familiarly smug. "and give me a chocolate flavoured Cappuccino, the biggest you've got, because jet-lag is a pain in the _y'knowwhat._"

Blaine whirls around so fast he knocks his messenger bag against the counter and the impact sounds suspiciously like a collision of laptop and wood, but Blaine doesn't care all that much.

"Jade?" he asks, once he is met with his sister's signature smile, a thick mane of skilfully tamed curls and green eyes that have earned her the unusual name – all of which should rightfully be across the Atlantic Ocean, attending some fancy pre-Cambridge institute.

"Blaine?" she mocks with a theatrical roll of her eyes and then grinning something fierce wraps Blaine into a rib-crushing hug.

She chuckles gently into his ear "Really, it's me, you can pick up your jaw off the floor now."

Somehow Blaine finds that a little hard to grasp, but that doesn't stop his lips from tugging up and squeezing her back until her breath catches. A quiet, excited laugh bubbles in his throat as he asks, "What are you doing here?"

"Getting coffee," she replies with a mischievous grin and pulls away to pick up the change the barista is holding out for her.

"What else would I be doing here?"

"No, I mean what are you doing _here_, in Ohio?" Blaine presses while they each take hold of their cup and head for the table usually occupied by him and Kurt, who is _still_ not here.

"It's not like I need a reason to visit," Jade slips into an empty seat, takes a sip of cappuccino and observes him over the rim of her cup, suddenly a little wary and disappointed. "I thought you'd be happy. We hardly get to see each other and I've missed you, besides Regionals are this week and there's no way I'm missing a chance to cheer you on."

Of course Blaine is happy to see his sister, ecstatic actually, but she could hardly make it home for Christmas due to her insane schedule and classes and silly unnecessary permits, and for her to just turn up out of the blue, there is something she is not telling him.

"No, no! Of -of course I'm happy you're here, Jade," he assures her hastily. "But what about school?"

Jade shrugs.

" 'm pretty sure it's still standing."

She swallows a mouthful of coffee then drawls, "but I'm not going back just to make sure."

It takes Blaine a few seconds to realise what she is telling him, and then only about a quarter of one to become worried.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he demands, and there is a trace of hurt lingering in his tone.

"You would have tried to stop me," Jade reasons, but her eyes have softened and she offers Blaine a repentant little smile. "And I didn't know myself, not until yesterday anyway. It was a pretty impulsive decision."

"Does dad know?"

Once uttered, the question hangs in the air above them like summer humidity, making it feel thick and drowning, until Jade waves it off with defiant confidence.

"I'm sure mom is going to break it to him as gently as she knows how."

Blaine winces sympathetically. "But-"

"Come on, Blaine," Jade nudges him gently with her knees. "Enough with my deserting daddy's dream of having a professional snob for a daughter in favour of chasing my dream of becoming a struggling performer and artist, why don't you tell me more about Regionals, and your set list and-"

She pauses and grins something dazzlingly diabolical. "Is Wes still in a long term relationship with his gavel?"

Blaine beams, all teeth and smug humour, momentarily forgetting his Kurt related issues, because really, who could say no to that smile... or Wes' gavel?

**x~X~x**

Gaga knows Kurt has gone through a whole cocktail of emotions on account of his undefined relationship with one Blaine Anderson.

In Kurt's eyes the boy has gone from being the Warbler heartthrob lead singer – '_let you put your hands on me in my skin-tight jeans_' was really just overkill – to being a friend in need and later a role model, an inspiration with his smooth confidence, talent, the warm eyes and that goddamn _smile_. Kurt had fallen so hard by then, it was hard to breathe or quit daydreaming, and he didn't have to, because his life had turned into animated chats, coffee breaks, flirty duets and frequent friendly touches that Kurt could feel all the way to the tips of his toes.

Then reality reared Jeremiah's blonde head, on freaking Valentine's day of all days, followed by sucking face with Rachel Berry and Blaine, at least as far as Kurt was concerned, had fallen from grace, while Kurt's blind adoration and infatuation received the mother of all bitch slaps. To make things worse, along came Sue Sylvester and planted the seed of sexy in Blaine's mind, and apparently when you applied that concept to Kurt, you got the illusion of gas pains, followed by a painful admittance regarding sexual experience – or lack thereof – and at that time Kurt really wished for the ground to open up and swallow him whole.

And last, but not least, Kurt thinks as he climbs out of his car and heads towards the Lima Bean, are the solos. Really, Blaine is amazing, Kurt has told him so on numerous occasions, and his voice does something to Kurt's insides that cannot be healthy, yet feels too good to worry about, but _come_ _on_! Every damn solo?

Yes, the council really does decide who is to sing lead, but there is never even a real audition for solos, they all just go to Blaine like they are his birthright or something. It's downright infuriating.

Kurt heaves a sigh and adjusts his scarf so it covers more of his face. The insides of his car have been much warmer than the chilling cold of the parking lot and he is shivering inside his coat. As he nears the entrance, he feels the familiar tingling feeling of excitement lingering in his stomach, and as much as he might want to be, he is no longer angry with Blaine.

A little disappointed maybe, but Blaine has tried his best to soothe Kurt's temper with the texts Kurt has received over the weekend. The boy is lucky Kurt is head over heels in love him or else forgiveness would be much harder to obtain.

On second thought, Kurt thinks, as he stops dead in his tracks right outside the door of the coffee shop, eyes glued to what are unmistakably Blaine's shoulders and the face of a dark haired girl who seems to have his complete attention.

Kurt's right hand, which is still resting on the doorknob, subconsciously tightens into a nearly painful fist, while he uses the other to wipe away the damp cloud of his ragged breath clinging to the glass. The unknown girl is laughing at whatever Blaine must have said and oh God, their thighs are brushing against each other and, Kurt is positive he hasn't just imagined Blaine bumping his shoulders against the girl's affectionately.

His first reaction is to run back to his car and drive until he's as far away from the sight right before him, followed by the wish to run them both over before he escapes, but he just remains standing there, unable to tear his eyes away. This can't really be happening, right? Blaine wouldn't do that, invite him for coffee and ask him to drive to Dalton early so they could catch up, and then schedule a date with a _girl_ at the same time, would he?

Well, he's kissed Rachel, an evil voice inside Kurt's head supplies, and given being bi-curious a decent shot. Having it been Rachel, Kurt reasoned it was safe to assume Blaine's beauty and fashion standards must be a little low when it comes to girls. But by the looks of things – and to Kurt's terror – Blaine's date has much more fashion sense than Rachel and sports immaculately shaped eyebrows. Her hair could use some work, though, Kurt notices with silent satisfaction, because even though she has managed to control its frizz, the girl's curls would probably appreciate some more product. Other than that, she is not at all unfortunate looking and that feels like a fist to Kurt's stomach.

He tries being rational next, because who knows, maybe the girl has a crush on Blaine – because really, who wouldn't? – and he is just letting her down easy. Kurt chooses to ignore that explanation, because you don't act that friendly around someone you are trying to get rid of, even if this _is_ Blaine.

She could just be a close friend, Kurt tries again. Blaine did say he was a hundred percent gay after that second kiss with Rachel. Kurt knows he's has had his cuddly moments with Mercedes, heck he's even snuggled with Rachel, and everybody knows cuddling is what Blaine's DNA consists of, so maybe-

OhsweetGagaonadiscostick!

Kurt feels the need to readjust his jaw as he watches Blaine trying to wrestle away the hand that is messing up his hair. He knows Blaine is very very touchy when it comes to his hair, and has never, _ever_ let anyone touch it in fear of removing the ton of gel keeping it in place, and now he's letting some stranger do it and even has a good laugh about it?

There is a limit to how much Kurt Hummel can take, and this has crossed it severely.

Before Kurt knows it he is pushing the door open with much more force than necessary and striding right towards Blaine and clearing his throat louder than necessary, and perhaps getting strange looks from several guests-

-and maybe he should have given rash actions a second thought... or two.

**x~X~x**

"Kurt! You made it."

Kurt first starts to regret his impulsive nature as soon as he sees his best friend turn around to appraise him with the brightest, happiest smile Kurt has ever seen stretching across his lips. It makes his face glow like that New Directions' Christmas tree Fin had been going on about a few weeks back, and he just looks so radiant, Kurt has a hard time remembering why he is supposed to be angry.

"Hello."

Oh, right. Her!

Kurt really needs to learn the girl's name, at least so he knows what name to give the closest available voodoo priestess. But on second glance, Kurt does notice she doesn't look so much like someone who's just been interrupted on a hot date and more like someone who is curious to meet the newcomer.

There come the first pangs of guilt all right, and Kurt remembers he has no right to be jealous or possessive. Blaine has every right to hang out with anyone he likes, and Kurt shouldn't make him suffer for it, because he is not Blaine's boyfriend and he has no claim on him whatsoever. Heck after what a bitch he'd been the last time they've spoken he has a hard time believing he is still Blaine's best friend.

Kurt's heart breaks a little.

"Am I-" he clears his throat awkwardly, to ease his suddenly very high-pitched voice, "interrupting something?"

For a second or two Blaine looks confused and maybe a little worried, as if he knows there is something Kurt isn't telling him, but then he smiles and gestures across the table.

"Kurt, this is Jade, she's-"

Kurt is not sure he even wants to know what or who _Jade_ is, because he is sort of terrified of the answer, and is almost relieved when she cuts Blaine off mid-sentence.

"Ah, so you're Kurt? It's great to finally meet you." - Finally? Just what is _that_ supposed to mean? - "Blaine's told me _so much_ about you."

Jade holds out her hand and although it is a very simple and expected gesture, Kurt notices the subtle yet unwavering confidence behind it, much like the one that seems to just roll off of Blaine in waves. He would have analysed the similarity further, and even shaken her hand, if it weren't for what she said.

"He...has?"

Kurt turns to glare half-heartedly at Blaine, his eyes squinting, because although that knowledge just sent a little tingle down his spine, it doesn't mean Blaine is off the hook.

"Like what?"

Blaine shifts nervously under Kurt's gaze, and unless Kurt's eyes are playing tricks on him, the tips of his ears are turning red. "I might have mentioned how... talented you are."

Jade laughs. "It's hard to stop him once he gets go-_ow_! What the hell, Blaine?"

She reaches a hand under the table to rub at her aching shin.

"Jade's my sister," Blaine offers as if it should explain everything.

Kurt's brain takes much longer than it should to process that piece of information.

"You guys are siblings?" he asks, a little breathless, and feeling like an idiot for the way he's acted.

"Twins, actually," Blaine adds helpfully and Kurt's jaw goes slack.

His eyes dart from one face to another, trying to find some obvious similarities, but mostly he just gets distracted by the warmth in Blaine's eyes and his thick eyelashes, and boy does he have it so bad it's pathetic.

Surprisingly, neither Blaine nor Jade seem shocked by his reaction. Instead they exchange amused glances and Jade tries her best to hide a chuckle with gulping down a sip from her cup.

"We get that a lot," she soothes with a grin, then glares at the top of Blaine's head which is still a little dishevelled from the work of her hands. "Trust me, the resemblance would be a lot less vague, if Blaine would just embrace the Anderson's curly heritage."

"How curly are we talking?" Kurt asks before he can stop himself, because he's always wondered just how much Blaine's gel-usage conceals from the world.

Blaine looks downright devastated as he runs his hand along his scalp to try and fix the damage, then answers in a heavy sigh, "Think Frodo, only ten times worse."

"It's true," Jade chimes in, extremely chipper. "I swear he had the cure for AIDS hidden somewhere in there, but then he cut most of it off. You should see him after a shower."

Kurt's throat goes dry. Oh God, why did she have to say _that_? Now all Kurt can think about is Blaine with a towel around his waist and droplets of water slowly trickling down his torso, and maybe getting caught in his bellybutton, then even lower across the thin trail of dark hairs that he imagines to be scattered there, while dark curly strands of hair hang before his eyes and cling to his neck and, and- He sort of stops thinking there because the blood in his brain has chosen to ignore his self-proclaimed baby penguin-ish characteristics and is very insistent on gathering somewhere bellow his stomach, and Kurt knows that groaning right now would be really embarrassing and inappropriate.

Unconsciously, the tip of Kurt's tongue swipes across his lower lip in hopes of generating enough saliva to form a reply, and he wonders whether the management of Lima Bean has decided to turn up the heating, and if he's really wrapped his scarf this tightly, or if it is simply trying to strangle him to save him from complete and utter mortification.

"I see," he murmurs with a slight cough to hide his cracking voice and rakes his mind for a quick comeback. "Well I, for one, think Elijah Wood pulled it off quite well."

To Kurt's extreme satisfaction, Blaine's face brightens considerably, and he seems blissfully oblivious to Kurt's embarrassing state of distress.

"Really?"

The disbelieving tone in Blaine's voice enables Kurt to gather the rest of his wits, along with his confidence. If anything, at least he's quick to reboot.

"Honestly, Blaine," Kurt states in the best exasperated tone of voice he can manage, while trailing his fingertips along his forehead, fixing any stray tresses of hair. "You don't think all those girls watched the movie because of the epic battles, do you?"

"I resent that," Jade snorts delicately, but otherwise shows no signs of having truly taken offence. "I think it was a great adaptation of the books."

"You read the books?"

"Repeatedly," she answers unabashed. "I'm wearing contacts today to hide my bookwormish nature, and would you _please_ sit down, you're making my feet hurt just by looking at you."

Kurt feels a brush climb up his neck. "Oh."

In all the commotion he's completely forgotten where he is.

Blaine hasn't.

"Kurt, I'm so sorry, I didn't know how late you would be, and I didn't want your coffee to get cold by the time you did come, so I didn't-" he hurries to explain, looking uncomfortable and maybe even a little flushed. "I can go get it now, the usual, right?"

Kurt ignores the skip of his heart, suddenly very aware of Jade's sharp and very perceptive-looking eyes darting from him to Blaine and back. "Don't worry about it, Blaine, I can go myself."

"Are you sure," Blaine asks, casting an uncertain glance back towards the counter. "The line looks pretty long. I could keep you company."

"I'll manage," Kurt assures him with an amused smile, trying to ignore the warmth spreading through his stomach; one he knows has nothing to do with the excessive layers he's wearing. In the spurt of the moment he adds with a chuckle, "I'm not a baby penguin when it comes to coffee, Blaine. I think I can handle a little wait."

Blaine smirks with a twinkle in his eyes. "I guess you did prove that on quite a few occasions."

"Well then," Kurt says as he turns into the direction of the counter where the staff is taking orders, "I will be right back."

**x~X~x**

"All right," Jade demands as soon as Kurt is out of hearing distance, "spill!"

Blaine blinks. "What?"

She rolls her eyes. "Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about. How long have you two been completely in love with each other?"

"We're not- I-" Blaine sputters, struggling to remain composed. "It's not like that."

"You're blushing!" Jade notices triumphantly, making Blaine glance nervously in the general direction where Kurt has disappeared to. "If I wanted to I could cut the sexual tension between the two of you like a cake."

"We're just friends," he shifts in his seat, unable to quite meet his sister's eyes. "Besides he's just transferred to Dalton a while back, and he's had some really bad experiences with bullies at his old school. He's not ready for a relationship."

"Doesn't stop you from lighting up like Christmas came early every time you see him," Jade states as calmly as if they are talking about the weather.

"I don't- " Blaine insists, although there's a voice inside his head eagerly agreeing with her every word. "You're imagining things, Jade, Kurt's just..."

Heaving a sigh, Jade crosses and uncrosses her legs. "Oh I'm sure we all have a 'Kurt' in our life, Blaine. Wikipedia likes to refer to it as 'significant other'. 'Soul mate' works too, for the hopelessly romantic."

Before Blaine can gather air to respond, something behind Jade's eyes shifts.

"This isn't about that Jeremiah fellow, is it?" she asks almost suspiciously.

This for Blaine is easy to answer. Even if it stings his pride. "Of course not. That was a total train-wreck anyway. ...wait what was wrong with Jeremiah?"

Jade looks a little uncomfortable at his last inquiry. "Nothing was _wrong_ with him – not if you're into Jasper from Twilight anyway~"

"I knew you didn't like him," Blaine says in a mixture of triumph and accusation.

"It's not that I didn't _like_ him," Jade reasons, "the two of you simply lacked chemistry."

"How would you know, you never even met him, you were in Europe when it happened?"

Exasperated his sister makes a face. "Think about it, Blaine, you only liked that boy in your head, with Kurt it comes from here." She reaches over to gently tap Blaine's chest right where his heart is. "Besides, if you and Jeremiah started dating your couple name would have sucked."

"Couple name?" Blaine repeats as if Jade has lost her mind.

She waves him off impatiently. "You have Jerelaine, or Blamiah, maybe even Jeblaine which all sound like some sort of tropical virus. On the other hand you could be KurtCoBlaine, how awesome is that? Or Klaine... that one definitely has the sexy factor."

"Where are you getting all these ideas from?" Blaine shakes his head in disbelief, trying to hide the thrill that's shot through him at how well his and Kurt's names fit together, while wanting to kick himself at the same time, because he is clearly going crazy himself.

"I have a lot of space in my head. A high IQ has its perks," Jade shrugs. "Ours is Blade by the way, which is pretty bad ass, as far as siblings go, if you ask me."

Blaine sighs, a little wistful. "Look, these names are really cool and all, but I don't think it changes anything, for all I know Kurt might not even like me back."

"Trust me, Blaine,he's completely crazy about you. I think he was close to spontaneously-combusting when I mentioned you and a shower in the same sentence," Jade laughs quietly. "I knew you've always been a little clueless about these things, but I had no idea it was that bad."

"And what happens if I screw things up? With all that's already gone down in the last few months, I'm not so sure he would want anything to do with me, even if he does – as you claim – like me," Blaine continues self-depreciatingly and looks over his shoulder to make sure Kurt is not in danger of approaching them too soon. "It's complicated."

"Only as much as you want it to be," Jade says gently and reaches over to give his hand a little squeeze. "Look, Kurt would be a complete idiot to ever turn down someone like you. And, judging by the five minutes I've known him in person, it's safe to assume he's pretty smart."

"Those things don't go hand in hand with each other," Blaine remarks, but his sister pays him no heed.

"Seriously, instead of moping, why don't we figure out what you are going to do about it?" she suggests.

"Who said I'm doing anything about it?"

Jade's smile is brilliant and so wide it probably hurts. "Because the Blaine Anderson I know never backs down from a challenge. You hardly need to try anyway."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Blaine demands, wavering between irritation and curiosity.

"You're a spontaneous flirt, most performers are," Jade explains as if talking to a little kid. "The poor boy's probably tripping over himself with every other word you say to him, over-analysing it, too, by the looks of things. And knowing you, most of the songs you choose are suggestive as hell."

Blaine feels the urge to smack his forehead.

"I might have sang Teenage Dream when we first met," he confesses with a groan.

For the next few seconds Jade seems unable to utter a single word, and Blaine is sure he can hear her astounded blink, then she erupts in a fit of giggles loud enough to earn her a few disgruntled glances from the people sitting at the tables around them.

"And would you?" she wheezes in between short gasps of air. "Let him put his hands on you in your skin-tight jeans?"

"JADE!"

"What was that about skin-tight jeans?" asks a voice behind Blaine's back, and the lead Warbler's blood runs cold.

"Kurt!" Blaine croaks, turning around to stare at Kurt's confused expression, his voice embarrassingly high. "We were just~"

"Blaine was helping me with boy troubles," Jade lies smoothly, looking like the cat that got the cream.

"Ah," Kurt hums in a way that suggests he could use some counselling himself, then sets his cup down onto the table, then swings his bag across the back of the nearest chair.

"I brought cookies, because I know you always order some," Kurt hands the plate over to Blaine, who takes it eagerly, but cannot help but adding, "although they are hazardous for your cholesterol levels. Feel free to take some too, Jade."

"Thanks, Kurt," she smiles warmly and rises to her feet. "But some other time, I gotta run."

"You're leaving?" Blaine asks, torn between disappointed because he wishes he could spend more time with her and eager to finally be alone with Kurt.

"I have to take care of a few useless formalities for my transfer to Crawford. You'll have me right across the campus if you need me, so I think you'll live," she winks, then fishes through her bag for a set of sticky-notes. "Besides I feel bad for intruding on your coffee time as it is."

Before either of them can protest, Jade scribbles something onto the top piece of paper, makes a little show of folding it in half, then slips it into Kurt's hand, completely ignoring Blaine's cautioning look.

"Call me if you ever feel like having some girl talk, or need a new shopping partner," she grins at the surprised look on the pale boy's face, leans across the table to drop a friendly kiss to Blaine's cheek, then heads for the exit.

"Oh, and Kurt?" she calls out, casting a look back at the table over her shoulders, showing off two rows of pearly whites that would make Julia Roberts jealous. "Take good care of my brother."

She disappears and both boys just remain sitting in an awkward and slightly stunned silence.

Eventually, Blaine clears his throat. "I'm sorry about that. Jade... takes some getting used to."

"I beg to differ," Kurt says with a slight pink dusting his cheeks, after sneaking a glance at the paper in his hand.

Following Kurt's eyes, Blaine eyes the treacherous yellow square, squinting in hopes of making out the words scribbled on it.

"What does it say?" he asks, feeling his heart beating in his throat.

Jade wouldn't have deliberately done something to embarrass him, would she?

Fast as lightning, Kurt slips the piece of paper into his pocket, and gives Blaine a smug smile. "She said I should make you pay for the cookies."

Blaine laughs, and just like that they both know they're okay, and that whatever might have happened before their meeting is already long forgotten.

**x~X~x**

That evening, when Kurt is safely tucked away in his single bedroom at Dalton, he pulls Jade's note from his jeans and falls into his bed in an excited fit of giggles.

It's juvenile and unnecessary, but he cannot help himself, because there, right under the digits of Jade's phone number, written in a casually elegant, girly script are the words:

_He's crazy about you, too. _

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** long oneshot is freaking LONG!

I'm not entirely sure I like it all, but there are parts of it I'm really proud of.

**Anyway, like it? Hate it? Constructive criticism? Any comment at all? Please share, especially if you subscribe or favorite. Not doing so might get you beaten with a disco-stick! :D  
><strong>

There is more to come if anyone would wish to read it.

**P.S.:** I might have borrowed one of Darren's quotes and modified it a little for this fic. I hope I won't get in trouble for that. (:


	2. Roadtrip

**Author's note:** Hello lovelies. There's not much to say about this little ficlet, other than it was extremely fun to write. It's short and sweet and hopefully humorous. However, I have a lot to say about you guys. So many reviews and favourites and subscriptions and all that positive feedback for this little story of mine... I feel the urge to pinch myself every time I open up my inbox in the morning.

I'm so touched and flattered and grateful and all kinds of love emotions are happening behind my computer-screen it's insane. And I owe it all to you. Seriously you're all amazing!

Thank you!

**PLAYLIST INCLUDES**

You should recognise the songs as you go along.

It's pretty straight-forward. :D

**Don't own Glee**, and especially not Klaine, and really, I wouldn't want to, because it should be shared with everyone across the globe. It would be selfish for one person to have it for themselves.

Enjoy.

**ANNOUNCEMENT:** I wanted to put writing this on hold, because I am currently also working on a continuation of the first oneshot. So many of you asked for it that I couldn't say no, and then the plot-bunnies jumped me, squeezed me into a corner, and I had no choice but to give in. It should be up soon, I promise. In the mean time, here's a little appetizer for more upcoming oneshots. **This chapter will later be switched out with the aforementioned 'part 2' to make this collection neater, and easier to read. It's really the third oneshot in the series. **

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><p><strong>x~X~x<strong>

**III. Road-trip**

Sometimes, Kurt really hates them both.

Okay so maybe _hate_'s a strong word.

He _severely dislikes_ them.

There, that sounds much better.

As much as he genuinely loves both Blaine and his sister, there are days and moments on which they are completely insufferable. Especially when they are within touching distance of each other – which, mind you, is sometimes too often for Kurt's peace of mind – and Kurt is unable to separate or distract them.

This would be one of those moments.

They are crowded in Jade's car together with three huge towels, two bottles of sunblock, a very girly pair of flip-flops, three bags containing their personal possessions, an _inflated_ inflatable mattress, a picnic basket the size of a small wagon and probably more sheet-music than one could find in the personal archives of one Rachel Berry, speeding down a nearly empty highway.

Correction.

Kurt is crowded between all the aforementioned things.

Usually he and Blaine would sit in the back seat together holding hands, maybe even cuddle a little bit and steal the occasional kiss, but Jade, grumbling something about that being hazardous to her blood-sugar levels, would have none of that. Due to her frequent practice of nepotism, Blaine has been assigned the front seat, while Kurt was ushered to the back.

Trying to be a gentleman, Blaine very quietly hinted they could move all their luggage into the trunk, but that would have left Jade's two guitars and numerous sketchbooks homeless.

Neither Kurt not Blaine dared to suggest she leave them behind.

Along with having no personal space, Kurt is also lacking the knowledge of their destination. However, where ever they are headed, he suspects it will drastically increase his chances of getting skin cancer.

When he's mentioned this to Blaine earlier in the morning, his boyfriend had merely grinned, pulled Kurt into a kiss and maybe slipped his hands into the back pockets of Kurt's jeans. He might have also given his ass a little squeeze and that was pretty effective as far as distractions go, especially when combined with nibbling on Kurt's lower lip and sliding his tongue along the roof of his mouth.

Shot Kurt's scapehorse straight between the eyes, too.

And the danger of a sunburn is not even the worst part of this road trip.

Nope.

_That_ would be the music.

Right on cue a loud '_Hey, what's the big idea?_' blares from the speakers, followed by something along the lines of '_dum da-dum du da du du dum_'. Kurt can already see Jade's head bobbing in time with the beat and Blaine is grinning, which can only mean one thing.

Kurt starts a mental countdown.

_Three... two... one_.

"I said sucking too hard on your lollipop, oh love's gonna get you down~"

Jade cracks up the volume as she and Blaine launch into a purposely slightly off-key rendition of the song, accompanied with fairly ridiculous headbanging, shoulder movements and wriggling of hips, while ignoring the restrictions of safety-belts. The majority of the moves also involve letting go of the steering wheel, and although driving is one of Jade's many skills, Kurt is not entirely sure he's comfortable with that happening too often.

And it's not that he has something against Mika, or Blaine and Jade's combined vocals, because they are nothing short of brilliant, both together and separate. But having his boyfriend sing about _sucking on a lollipop_ is just a little too suggestive for Kurt, and Blaine has just _winked_ at him in the little mirror glued to the shades on the windscreen.

Kurt's imagination doesn't care whether Blaine is deliberately trying to be seductive or is just being his cute and affectionate self, because _shit_, that was hot, and now Kurt feels the urge to cross his legs.

Baby penguin his ass.

Fortunately the song has come to an end, and what happens next is probably the best buzz-kill on the face of the planet.

"Boom clap, boom de-clap de-clap, boom boom clap, boom de-clap de-clap~"

Kurt's forehead smacks against the side window.

His groan must have been loud enough to be heard over the music, because Blaine has twisted in his seat to look back at him, and Kurt can see Jade studying his reaction in the rear-view mirror.

"Everything all right back there, Kurt?" she asks before Blaine has the chance to make a fuss about it.

Kurt considers being polite, he really does.

"Actually no, not really," he informs her cheekily. "Jade, while I appreciate the effort obviously put in the song selection, I would prefer it if it would include at least a hint of Gaga, or maybe Brittney. I am even prepared to consider Lifehouse as an alternative."

Jade's eyes narrow and Kurt knows he's poked the bear.

"I really, _really_ like you, Kurt, but if you repeat that last part I might make you jog behind us for the rest of the trip."

Kurt's eyes dart to Blaine questionably, because he finds himself unable to decipher the severity of Jade's threat.

Much to Kurt's terror, his boyfriend looks a little worried.

"She's only slightly kidding, Kurt."

Well that certainly isn't what Kurt was hoping to hear.

"And you have nothing to say about this?"

The corners of Blaine's mouth twitch despite the unspoken threat he sees in Kurt's eyes. "You did insult her favourite band, and, well... I kind of like this song."

From the speakers, Miley leans it left and Kurt just knows Blaine is about to add the triple clap, even before he as much as moves a muscle.

Very slowly, and with a pointed stare, Kurt shakes his head. "Not unless you wish to remain celibate for as long as this relationship shall last."

If recorded, the shift of Blaine's facial features from amused to positively mortified would have probably won Kurt first place on America's Best Home Videos.

"What? No! Kurt you can't be- You know I didn't-"

Blaine would have continued his rant of half-formed sentences indefinitely if it weren't for Jade's low chuckle.

"Well that sure gives new meaning to the term blue-ba~"

"JADE!"

"What?" she waves it off dismissively. "You two are endgame after all."

Jade doesn't miss the blush that stains both their cheeks, or the impossibly tender look they share when they think she isn't looking.

She feigns a resigned sigh, although what she really wants to do is smile. "All right, grumpy, you win, but only because you two are the cutest thing I've ever seen."

Reaching over to the dashboard, Jade unplugs her ipod from the stereo then proceeds to shuffle through the available radio stations, until she stumbles upon one currently playing the second half of Born This Way.

Suddenly the back seat no longer seems as crowded and as Kurt starts to quietly hum along, Blaine's hand reaches back to search and entwine with his, giving it a little squeeze.

They have to pull apart a few seconds later, because the odd angle is making Blaine's hand cramp, but Kurt doesn't mind that much, because maybe, just maybe today might not be one of those insufferable Blade-days, as Kurt has gotten around to calling them.

That is until-

"Oh my God, I love this song!"

"Me too, it's a shame we didn't get to perform it at Regionals."

That's it. Kurt is jinxed, he's sure of it. Because of all the songs in existence, the DJ has just chosen the one Kurt wishes he could scrub from his memory with bleach. What's worse is that Blaine seems completely oblivious to both the coincidence and Kurt's embarrassment.

To add insult to injury he and Jade simultaneously join in on a seemingly endless intro consisting of only the word 'Na', and Kurt knows there is only one thing left for him to do.

Hope the back seat magically swallows him whole, while he contemplates the pros and cons of first degree murder.

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><p>Don't really have much to say, because this hardly involves a complex plot, but I hope it at least made you smile.<p>

I gave witty-bitcy!Kurt my best shot, and I'm sorry if I butchered the characterization. ^/ / /^

Review? (:


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